Mean mom

At Emma's recent foray into cheerleading there was a little girl with Down's who came out with the younger group.  I think I heard an audible "awww" from the crowd, including myself.  Quite patronising really - look at the special needs girl trying to be like all the others.

As the performance got underway she sat down on the ground and played with her Pom-poms.  I saw her mom, off to the side, quite adamantly mouthing and gesturing for her to get up and participate.  At the time I thought she might be a little harsh - patronising and judgemental, nice!

But tonight, on the sidelines at Emma's gymnastics class, I found myself in sync with the other mom.  All the girls were trying cartwheels, which emma is not good at, and nor am I!  She gave great effort to set up the cartwheel according to instructions, but would basically drop to the ground once her hands were down.  I was audibly frustrated and could be heard saying "try harder", "you're not even trying to get your legs up."

And so I find myself wondering if the moms sat near me, who don't know us, were doing the same thing I had.  I wonder if they look at emma, the rotund little girl who doesn't run nearly as fast as the others, and clearly has something different about her, and think "yay for trying!"

Now I am proud of emma for trying - not because she has Moebius Syndrome and should be discounted from such activities (that's rubbish), but I'm proud of her because she is doing something she loves and is persevering even though she is not very good at it, yet.  Even I find it tempting to quit because progress is slow, and maybe I feel self-conscious for her.

Maybe I'm tougher on her because I see her potential, I see her ability and I want so hard for her to succeed at her dreams and goals.  And maybe I look like a meanie to other moms!