Boxing Day

Today is Boxing Day in the UK (and Canada!). In years past I would head out to the stores and hit the sales! Not today. I went for my 6 week post partum check-up. I went back to the midwives I saw at the beginning of the pregnancy because they were so great. I'm pleased to say all is well and back in place. I have no excuse now to not start the pilates DVDs I got for Christmas!

One thing the midwife said to me, which I have been told many times lately is "I can't believe you're smiling!" I'm never sure how to respond. Sometimes I say "it's either laugh or cry" or some other cliche. However what I really want to say is "That is the power of God. The power to help you see the joy and blessing in the most difficult of circumstances."

Almost everyone we tell about Emma tells us that they are praying for us. We are very thankful and hope they continue. I'm sure everyone is praying in a different way, for Emma to be healed, to come home, for our endurance, for the future etc. All of these things are important.

What can be difficult to understand is that God does not always answer prayers as you expect (as the Bible tells us.) Prayer is not our time to demand a specific outcome from God, because God is not subject to our demands. Can you imagine a world where God answered everyone's prayers as they ask? Who would win the Super Bowl!!

Prayer is an admission of our need for God's help. We are acutely aware that we are powerless to help Emma's recovery beyond comforting her. However we know God can because he is all powerful. (That's an important thing to know when you decide how to live your life!)

Additionally when you actually spend time in prayer, dedicated time talking and listening with God (like meditation!) he may actually change the very thing you planned to ask for! Why is that significant? When Jesus was waiting in the Garden of Gethsemane, for the Romans to come and arrest him leading to his crucifixion he prayed to God for some other way. Who wouldn't! But he followed it up with the crucial decision to ask for God's will, not his own.

It would have been our will that Emma would be born perfectly healthy and home in a few days. However, if that was the case we would not have been able to connect with so many people as we have in the last 6 weeks. I would not have been able to ever express the truth about Jesus in such a simple way - by telling you about my relationship with him. I would not understand how precious a simple smile or frown is.

And so, we have embraced God's will, because as you have seen, it is in God's will that he can give the most glorious demonstration of his love and grace. Your prayers are being answered. We are receiving everything we need spiritually, emotionally and physically to get through this. There is certainly a purpose behind Emma's situation, and we are thankful that we will come through it having seen the greatness of God.

I am pleased to report that Emma's fever subsided and she is doing better. She is still weak and pretty unhappy. The blood cultures they drew yesterday came back positive for bacteria in her blood (septicemia). They will know in a day or two what kind of bacteria it is so they know if the antibiotics she is on will help.

Please join with us in praying for Emma to be comfortable and to feel better soon. However, not our will, but God's.