Emma's third week back at church today, and right before we leave, some kid tells Emma she looks weird.

Our church is small, it's family and so many adults have been loving on Emma, telling her (and me) how wonderful she looks. But of course, this one negative comment upsets her. I asked her how many people had told her how great she looks today and she said "tons". So I suggested that she listen to those comments first.

It's so hard. She has more of a smile than before, but currently looks no less "different" than before surgery, it's just a different kind of different, if that makes sense.

My heart was already heavy, patiently waiting for healing to finish, and therapy to kick in, wondering if we did the right thing - no, I'm not 100%, this was so right yet, and that makes me feel guilty.  I'm not sure how much my own insecurities are playing into my fears (a lot, right?) or if I'm just not able to be objective. 

I don't know what my expectations were, and we are only 4 weeks out from surgery, so I'm talking myself through this time, trusting God and trying to be strong.