All clear

I had a follow-up appointment with my surgeon today.  I took a friend with me because the surgeon has a tendency to talk really fast and run over me!  

I was then really surprised that he was really friendly!  He took a look at my wound and said everything looks great.  He asked me a few questions and told me I could drive again and go back to work.  I still have to avoid heavy lifting and go back again in two weeks.

Everything was going great, until I got home and I got light headed.  I had gone to a meeting at church in the morning and not slept well the night before.  I ate some lunch and waited for it to clear, but as I type I'm still a little light headed/dizzy.

Throughout the evening, as the severity eased we debated whether or not I should go to the ER.  I had called the surgeon earlier and he said to go if I was still experiencing it later, but didn't sound too concerned.  Pops took my blood pressure on his machine and it was fine.

So, in the end I opted not to go.  And that of course leads to fears about what might be wrong and what might happen in my sleep.  I used to worry about leaving the kids and driving on the highway to work each day (dangerous!), but now I have crazy health concerns.

I know, this is not how God intends for me to live, in fear of something I can't control or predict. I'm still working on that!

I put the kids to bed and tried to love on them as much as possible, without them thinking I'm nuts!  (they'll know I am soon enough!)  I guess there's just no way to avoid all the scenarios you can fear, or fear itself.  Faith is trusting that, as you proceed through life, your worst fear may happen, but God is in control...

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28