Prima Ballerina

Here are some of the pictures I took of Emma during Saturdays ballet class...

On Sunday Emma went to a birthday party for one of the girls in her pre-school class.  It was at one of those places with an indoor climbing area.  Unfortunately the area was small and the obstacles were too big for her. It was made worse by the fact that she only knew a couple of the kids and they were much quicker running around.

 

She handled the pizza like a pro though!!

I think it was a little discouraging for her - at least it was for me!   It's good to know that ballet is really going to help her strength, balance, posture and confidence.  The teachers are really supportive and many of the girls are knew and un-coordinated!

We're going to take the kids to our favorite inside playground this week, where Emma has plenty of space and can manouvre around by herself.  I have to try not to project what I see and assume that Emma is self-conscious about her abilities, but that said I will do everything I can to help her find self-confidence and inner strength.

And she has two special boys looking out for her...

Airport Adventure

A few months agao, for a night out with the kids, we took a drive down to the airport and parked under the flight path so the kids could see the planes close up.

We took some snacks, folded down the third row of seats and let the kids loose in the car.  We all ended up in the front seats watching the planes descending toward us.

It was fun...

Post-ballet feast!!

Strange Saturday

Saturday did not go according to [my] plan at all!

I initially planned to get up early, like 7am, and take the minivan in to have scheduled maintenance.  However, I never called ahead and with two coughing kids sleeping in bed with me the night before, I was reluctant to get up! 

In the end I got up at 8am and asked Emma if she'd like to go to dance class.  My friend and I had discussed taking our daughters and she was going to check out the class at 9am.  Emma popped right up and was totally in to it.

I took her to get dressed and she agreed to wear black leggings, a black t-shirt and the black ballerina skirt she was given some time ago.  This was pretty cool, because normally she refuses to wear skirts with leggings, but she believed me that it's what ballerina's wear.

She happily wore her "costume" (as she called it) and we went off to dance class.  Out of the car and heading for the studio, Emma tripped and hit the ground hard.  She cried and when I got her inside I saw she had ripped the knee of her leggings!  She was easily calmed down ("Do we need to go home?") and the teachers said they had tights she could wear.  (A brand new pack costing $8, but it's all worth it!)

We were kind of late so I didn't have much time to talk to the instructors or find out what the routine is.  I suppose that worked out because I tend to over-think and over-inform people!  As it was I did mention to the main instructor that Emma has Moebius and the subsequent balance and strength issues.  She was fine and as you'll see below, Emma really didn't seem any less coordinated than some of the others!

Sorry about all the mini-clips - I can't find a way to download them off my phone in one piece, and I didn't have my "always in my purse" camera, ironically! 

Mary Ann, Ilah's mom and myself waited in the lobby, watching our graceful swans in the classroom.  Ilah, who turned 3 that day, did great too.  Emma seemed to be making friends, but may have over-stepped the line when she told another girl to get back on her spot!  The girl wasted no time in telling the teacher when she saw Emma stray also!

Emma was instantly captivated by the wall of mirror's in the room and kept dancing around to ensure the best possible angle of herself!!  It was quite possibly the cutest, funniest hour.

Afterward, before I knew what was happening, she had a new pair of ballet slippers, tap shoes and was in the line-up for the recital in May!  Now, I know I like to shop, but in Jekyll and Hyde fashion, I am also a spend thrift!!  However, there was no hesitation on my part to agree to whatever costs were associated with this new love for Emma.  It's just another reason why I'm thankful to be working and can afford it.

When Toby is ready to start pre-school and hobbies we will endeavor to provide the same opportunities for him, without hesitation.  That is if he doesn't run up too many medical bills in the meantime...

Later that afternoon we headed over to Ilah's birthday party.  As you will have seen, it was unseasonably warm (for March, let alone January!) and spontaneously the party flowed out into the backyard. 

About 2 hours into the party, everyone was outside for "pin the strawberry on shortcake".  Toby, totally disinterested ran around throwing the dogs toy for her and climbing on the play equipment.  Heading down the shortest slide ever (not kidding, it's like two feet long) he fell off the side and bumped his head on the corner of the stone BBQ that was nearby.

He got up and started crying as Scott saw blood start to flow from the side of his head.  He grabbed him, yelled "he's bleeding" and headed for inside.  I followed and called for Ilah's mom, who happens to be a nurse.

It was a deep cut, bleeding nicely so we headed off to the ER.  By the time we got there (me driving, Scott keeping pressure on the wound and getting nauseous from me driving) the bleeding was minimal and we could see an inch long cut. 

(I was gonna post a picture here, but thought you might not like it!!)

Toby, who had not napped that day and at risk for falling asleep from concussion/fatigue, showed no signs of either and was bouncing of the walls (figuratively of course) as we waited for two hours in the small, crowded waiting room.  Once in the treatment room he laid on the bed with me, eating crackers.  He fell asleep on Scott after fighting it hard, after 3 hours at the hospital - definitely not concussed!

 You know how much it bothered me that he was rolling around on a hospital floor. (They aren't the cleanest places, really!!)

The doctor hoped to do the stitches while he slept, but Toby woke up and while he shouldn't have felt pain, was not happy.  I was laying holding him and his arms, as Scott held his legs which were doing their best to push off me, and the nurse held his head still! 

He has three stitches which really don't seem to bother him.  If his head does hurt he pulls a sad face, points at his head and says "Me booboo!"

After 3 and a half hours at the hospital, we were back at the party (everyone had left and eaten all the cake!), Emma didn't notice we were gone and Toby was raring to go again!!

We have some tough kids!!

That's right - its January 7 and I'm wearing flip flops outside!!!

Emma finds a new use for the tea cosy I got Scott for Christmas.
That's right, he loves tea way more than I do!!

Studies show...

while it's true that you can pretty much find a "study" that backs up any perspective, it was a source of joy to me today to see this as I perused the internet on my lunch break:

Working Mothers Are Healthier (STUDY)

The article, which did not criticize any mom status, echoes my feeling about working, which is nice, on my first day back after a long break.

The article (found here) said "the working mothers experienced better work-life balance and fewer incidents of depression when their kids were infants and pre-schoolers."

And added "It also may be that mothers who are home with children all day experience greater child-related stress which is relieved to some extent once children are in school,"

I was off work from December 23 until today and it really was a question on whether I would find myself wishing to have the freedom to stay home each day.  

It was nice to wake-up with the kids (literally, one on each side!) and kick around in our PJs for much of the day. But, when it came to running errands or doing chores, I found myself getting stressed and frustrated with the kids.

It wasn't fun for anybody.  They wanted to play with me because I was there, and I was trying to somehow do it all and let them know I love them.  I'm not good at finding that balance, no, I'm terrible at it!  I can not switch of my chore radar long enough to sit down and color or play cars.  (Maybe I'm programmed to work first and chores seem like the primary responsibility for me as "stay-home", when it should be the kids come first.)

Interestingly I felt more guilt about that than I do when I leave them to come to work.  Maybe that's because they have such a great time with Nanna and Pops!  (All week they asked to go and see them, and if they can't they want to call them!)

When I'm at work during the week, I feel less of a burden to get all the chores done because I know that I have been busy earning.  That may sound crazy, but my logic does not always follow conventional wisdom!

In conclusion, for me and my family, it is better for me to work part-time (at a job and company I enjoy) and easier for me to dedicate my free-time to the kids in balance with that. 

Regardless, the kids seem happy and while I will always struggle to leave them, any time, any where, Emma helps me.  She picked up a line from a movie at some point, about never leaving me, or me never leaving.  She'll hug me and tell me "I'll never go away from you."  I hug her back twice as tight and say the same back to her.  She often now adds "but it's okay if you go to work!"

(In case you're wondering, because you know me really well - I do also add that if, for some reason, I was not around, that I will always be with her in her heart, as long as she remembers me.  To which she replies "in my belly?!"

Exercise bike

Big thanks to PB and Esther for passing along a video game bike that
they were given but never used.

Emma loves it, but keeps asking for help pushing the pedals!!

New year ahead

I have always loved Christmas, and having the decorations up as long
as possible was important.

This year it was the day after Christmas when I was ready to put the
decorations away! Maybe having two active kids and all their stuff
around contributed. But I decided I didn't want to start the new year
off with cleaning up Christmas!

Friday the kids "helped" me de-trim the tree (see picture), then I
cleaned the house.

It was a practical and symbolic way to start the new year. 2011 has
been an incredible year and life is good.

Whatever 2012 brings our way, I choose to embrace it, follow Jesus and
find joy in all circumstances.

Wherever you are, whatever you're doing, I hope you have a happy new year.

Out with the old

It's hard to believe we're finishing the year off with Emma needing no
extra medical intervention.

And I'm determined to get rid of the remnants from that era (except
for a couple examples to show her in a few years).

One of the remaining items was a stockpile of the special formula Emma
got. We had 7 cases in the basement "in case of regression".

I think we're safe to move on at this point, so we are donating 4
cases to a family in Wisconsin who don't have formula covered by
insurance.

The rest will expire this week so we will have to toss it. :-(

I'm looking forward to the new year like never before. God has amazed
me in 2011 with unexpected blessings and big prayer answers (remember
the 6 week challenge?).

If you still haven't grasped this biblical truth, now's the time:

God loves his people and that includes you. He will bless you and
lead you to green pastures too. You just have to trust and follow
him.

Christmas Eve

 

Emma said more than once "this is going to be the best Christmas ever".  I had to agree with her, of the four she has been around for.

It is crazy to me that Emma is now four, and Toby is two already, but things are so much more fun with the kids!

Emma was great to pose for some pictures for me - Toby is much tougher to get, even to just look at the camera!

We headed  up to church for candlelight communion, which turned out to be a lot of "fun" because the kids stayed in service with us!  Toby was happy to sit with Pops and Kimberly, while I kept Emma close by me and Yu (our next door neighbor who came along).

It's been a while since Emma sat in church with me, and I guess I had thought she'd be like the quiet still infant she was a few years ago,  Not so - she was very much the fidgety child I know I had been.  

In fact at one point she wanted to lay down because she was tired!  I remember asking my mum the same thing when we were watching my sister in a school Christmas service, sitting on hard wooden pews.  At this point though I was at a loss to stop her disturbing those around us and agreed!

It was a great service and it was awesome to see Emma holding her candle and singing along to Silent Night.

I snapped this great picture of the kids after.  Emma, Toby and Nate are usually the first kids at church and often there for practices and the like.  It's cool that they have become good friends.

Christmas Morning

On Christmas morning Emma came in to us around 6:40am.  She was still a little sleepy as I said "Merry Christmas!"  Immediately her head picked up and she smiled a "Merry Christmas" back, before hugging me.  Without pause she added "Are there presents under the tree?"

We were going over to Scott's parents for the rest of the day after church, so we had taken all the gifts over there, to open with the family.  However, we knew Emma at least understood that "Santa" leaves stuff under the tree, and while we aren't perpetuating the myth, we don't want them to think they are "bad" because they didn't get stuff from him.

Therefore, we had a couple of little things waiting for them under the tree when they came downstairs...

 Let me tell you, Toby did not put that flashlight down all day!  It was likely his favorite gift!

Then we headed off to church - on time!!

A kids Christmas

After church we headed over to Nanna and Pops house for the afternoon.

 The kids did really well waiting for everyone to get there and then eat lunch before they were able to open any gifts. (Of course that was great motivation to eat up!!)

Last year you may recall the kids barely had any gifts on Christmas as we were not supposed to be home.  The year before Toby was a baby and we didn't have too much for Emma that year.  This year it was a blessing to be able to have gifts from everyone in the family, home and abroad, for them to enjoy.

In fact no sooner had Emma opened one gift, than she moved on to the next!  She definitely enjoyed the surprise every tim.  Toby on the other hand followed Emma's pattern of previous years, happy to play with the thing he opened (or whaever Emma had!).

 Our little Strawberry Shortcake...

Toby enjoyed Emma's new DVD player...

My gift from Scott - expect many more pictures now people!  This phone has a camera with a flash and a video camera, plus I got a tiny little camera from my family, to keep in my purse.  No more missing the kids key moments!

Toby really  liked Emma's guitar (don't worry, it's plastic, not wood!)

Scott tried out Kimberly's new Zumba on Wii!

Back home the kids got a gift each from Grant...

And then enjoyed their other new toys before bed

 

 

It was really a fun Christmas and the kids had a blast.  Right now, Emma is having a tea party in her room with her giant teddy bear!  

Now to find a good home for all the old baby toys that the kids don't need anymore...

This is how she decorated her room - with her jewelry! So cute.

Quote of the day

We were laying on the mattress ala the picture I already posted.
Emma, coming down the stairs asks "mom, can you help me take my dress
off?"

Not unusual, so I respond "sure. Why?"

"I have a plan. You're gonna be amazed at what I do. I'm gonna make
my whole body sparkle!"

Uh-oh!!

A few minutes later it was topped with (yelled from upstairs): "mom,
you're gonna love it - I decorated my whole room!"

Double uh-oh!!

Christmas Eve morning

This is how we are spending the morning!

Scott was up late at church and I am sick, so we set up the air
mattress for our early rising kids to play on (and us to snooze on)!!

Now that's a good morning!!

Reflections

Looking back 10 years, life was very different.  Fresh off my one-year sabbatical in Philadelphia, I was living in my own home for the first time, back in my home town.  I had never felt the burden of some, to leave the town and make a start somewhere else.

However, I was probably as lonely as I had ever been.  I had no goal in life and didn't really have any dreams.  (I've always kept my expectations low to avoid disappointment!)

So, as I sit here now, with my two awesome kids watching TV next to me in the bed I share with my aslo awesome husband, I'm awestruck.

I could not have scripted the past 10 years, a journey that has taken me to 3 continents and brought some of the most special people I've ever met into my life.

Just the last 5 years, as many of you have been reading about, we have experienced things that many people will not, nor would they, want to experience.  However I would not change a thing.  There is not one hesitation in my being that I am in exactly the best and right place I could be.  And for that I am so thankful.

Think back over the past 12 months with me...if I had been told or told you that Emma would be completely independent of the tube I doubt we'd have believed it.  If you could have told me that I would go back to work part-time (loving it) and Scott's parents would be able to watch the kids - ridiculous.  For Scott to be working as a foreman in a new company, where the future looks bright, I know he'd have laughed!

But, here we are.  Life is good and when I stop to think about it, which I should do more often, it brings me so much joy.  I really should stop and remember before I lose my patience over mess or laundry!!

It's so important to remember how God's ways are not our ways, and that He does things based on a big picture we do not see. 

When Jesus came as a human baby, the most vulnerable of people, born to an unlikely, unwed, couple in a dirty, animal shelter, it was hardly the arrival many would have expected.  

In the first couple years of His life, His family were exiled in order to save Him from the genocidal King Herod.  And he spent 30 years preparing for His ministry - God did not send a "wham, bam" Savior who dropped in, gave the word and dropped out, back to His glorious throne in heaven.

Instead, Jesus lived among the poorest of people, under hostile government of the Romans, and hostility from his own religious leaders who did not like the talk of freedom from rules and a spirit of love (that would've robbed them of their control and power).

And when it came time to bring victory to the Kingdom of God over death, it was through assuming our place of cruel and degrading punishment, as a sacrificial lamb, that He conquered death and displayed His power.  Not some display of visual might and glorification in front of men.

Although the prophets of the Old Testament did tell us, years before His coming, of these events, still many struggle to believe that this is the path that God has laid out for us to enter into eternity with Him.

I think most people believe there is a god, but if you want to believe that God is loving and actually does want you to go to heaven for eternity, surely you have to believe that the same God would so clearly tell you how you can do that.

Which begs the question, will you believe Jesus?  (If you're not sure what Jesus said, maybe it's time to read it for yourself or get to a church that will tell you.)  Don't leave it to chance, or even someone else to tell you, make sure you know your future.

Countdown to Christmas

It stands to reason that the week before Christmas I would get sick, but that has not dampened my excitement for this weekend.  The gifts are all wrapped (only took me 4 hours, kid-free!!) and I can't wait to see the joy I know the kids will experience when they open them.

Wednesday was Emm'a school Christmas show and we were very excited about that.  I didn't know until 12.55pm that Scott was on his way.  He made it with just minutes to spare, and it was a nice surprise for me and Emma.

Unfortunately I only recorded "Rock Around the Christmas Tree" - don't give me a hard time, I was devastated when I realized I missed the second song.

She did really well, and I didn't know how it would go because she was crying after she first saw me and couldn't come sit with me!

Afterward we took the kids to Chick Fil A for a treat.

Scott got out of work early on Friday and doesn't go back until Tuesday.  We have Candlelight communion Saturday evening and then church on Sunday, before Christmas celebration with Nanna, Pops and the rest of the family.

I hope to have lots of video and pictures for you after the weekend.  

If I don't get to tell you before, I hope you have a Merry Christmas.  Whether you are with family, friends or alone, please take some time to consider how much God loves you and that the gift of His coming is in the peace and joy from the hope of a second chance through Christ.