Thursday, April 30, 2009

Weekly progress

It has been a pretty routine week so far. I was able to go up to church on Tueday morning and today to work on some things, thanks to Grandma Ellen! Other than that Emma and I have been home, with occupational therapy on Tuesday afternoon as usual, and physical therapy later today.

This has meant I have been able to keep Emma on the schedule I initiated last week. She had a couple later nights on Friday and Saturday, but since Sunday has been in bed by 7.30pm every night. She now falls asleep in less than 5 minutes, I might even say 2 minutes! The real beauty is that she has not been getting up before 6.30am each day!! In fact today I stayed in bed until 7am.

As for naps, she goes down between 12 and 12.30pm every day, and is asleep very quickly. I do not get her up for at least 2 hours. One day she was in bed until 3.30pm! Today though I haven't checked in on her once and it's been over two hours.

Her daily cumulative sleep is between 12-14 hours. Beautiful!! I am sure there will be times we have to deviate from the routine, but this schedule is working great for all of us.

As for me, I'm almost 20 weeks pregnant, that's halfway if you didn't know! In general I feel fine physically and I feel #2 moving around periodically. Thankfully the heartburn has not kicked in to high gear, yet! I am also anticipating the arrival of my cankles (ankles that are the same size as my calves, or small cattle!!) Last pregnancy they resembled flesh colored putty, and had the same molding properties! I'll show you pictures when they swell up.

Emotionally I'm okay (I think, you'll have to ask Scott to confirm!!). I have always had a pretty negative body image though, and the early stages of pregnancy wreak havoc on my self-esteem. As I put it to one friend my 'bump' has spread to my bum and thighs!! Oh where, oh where are the floaty summer clothes?!!

Scott reminds me that I had the same feelings last time, only much earlier, so I guess I should feel good that I've only gained 15lbs so far.

Those of you in the know will be wondering when my ultrasound is. No, I haven't had it yet! I'll post the results in a couple of weeks, but I'm not being specific about when it is. I'll worry plenty for you all!

And now for an amusing story! In the past 30 years I developed a strong need for cleanliness in the house (bordering on obsession), so every day when Scott comes in from work, covered in dust and debris, I unconsciously comment on how dirty he is and won't let him do anything until he's cleaned up. Apparently it's not gone unnoticed. Yesterday Emma took one look at him and signed "Daddy dirty!" Ooops. I really don't want her to be as neurotic as me so I'll have to watch it!

Here are some visuals from Sunday for you...




with baby Aaron

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Emma slept from 7.15 pm to 6.30am!! YES!!

Monday, April 27, 2009

Sleep saga - Episode 6

Yesterday Emma has a brief nap in the morning and slept on Scott for an hour at lunchtime, so by 7pm she was so ready for bed! After a quick bath, to clean off the sunscreen, she fell asleep while Scott dressed her for bed!

This morning Emma slept until 6.45am! It's been months since she slept that late. I didn't know what to do with myself. When she did wake up she was still sleepy and I started to worry that maybe she was sick!

Despite that we headed to the park for a swing at 10am, before it got too hot - though it was pretty hot already! I could tell that Emma was getting sleepy by the time we got home, so I fed her and planned to put her down at noon.

She wasn't happy as usual, but once she fell asleep she slept on and off for 2.5 hours! When I did get her up it was because I heard her moving around, but there was no crying and she was not clingy when I picked her up.

Is the saga over? Only time will tell, but I'm definitely feeling optimistic!!

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Happy Birthday to me!


So, I'm now 30 years old. I'd say I don't feel 30, but for all I know I could be feeling 40!! I do know that I feel pretty good and I don't have any regrets about where I am in my life, in fact I would say I've exceeded all of my greatest expectations. And that feels great!

As last weekend was my big birthday celebration today was more like a normal Sunday. I did however invoke birthday privileges to get breakfast in bed! Scott got off lightly - a bowl of Coco Krispies (Coco Pops in the UK) is hardly a big breakfast!

Emma joined us in bed at 5.45am, although I think she was up much earlier than that. (She later fell asleep during church!) Here you can see how we amuse her while we try and wake up (or try not to wake up!)


We were teaching the youth group today, so we had a relaxed morning as I taught them about the beginnings of the Church. A meeting of the church leadership team right after service included a pizza lunch (nice!) and a round of "Happy Birthday!!"

Then home for some rest before we have a nice barbecue for dinner. Did I mention it is 91 degrees today? Never get weather like that on my birthday in England for sure!!

And so it begins, my thirties! I can only pray that they are as full and exciting as the past few years have been.




Saturday, April 25, 2009

Birthday Blog

I turn 30 tomorrow!! Despite all the twists and turns of the past ten years I still don't really feel like I should be 30!!

Here's a brief (phew!) retrospective of the last 10 years...

20 - Still living at home with my parents, working as an Editorial Secretary and spending most of my money on clothes and going out with friends! My car was my baby - a black Toyota Paseo, sporty and sexy!!

21 - I embark on a one year sabbatical placement to my company's Philadelphia Office. It turned out to be a life changing experience and though I missed the UK I ended up wanting to stay! It was not to be and I came home when my visa expired.

22 - Not quite able to adjust to life with my parents (they had a hard time too!), I bought my sisters house from her and move out on my own. I get my car/baby back and start a new career in advertising sales within the same company. Pretty much back in the old routine.

23 - More of the same.

24 - An unquenchable drive leads me to take a position back in the Philadelphia office. This time indefinitely. I sell the house (ch-ching) and my car (sob!) and schlep all my stuff across the Atlantic for a third time!

Once in Philly it takes a few months to decide which direction to go in. After a few months of partying hard I reconnect with a friend from my last stay who helps me connect with the suburban church she had taken me too once or twice.

Before long I become a Christian. That means, to coin a phrase: You get your past forgiven, you get a purpose for livin', and you get a home in heaven.

In the October of that year a stranger (friend of a friend) agrees to transport me to a bible study, which becomes a regular arrangement. The weekly car ride becomes a great conversational environment and we become friends.

I also changed roles with my company to a permanent job back with my boss from my first trip, and proceed to get a green card. No getting rid of me now!!

25 - I start dating this guy, Scott and it's good, but not great. And then we head to Africa on a missions trip. After I've moved out to the suburbs to be closer to my friends and church, could this relationship go bad and spoil everything? As it turns out, no! Africa proves to be the 'make' of a make or break trip!!

26 - Two days before my 26th birthday, and one day after meeting my parents for the first time on their visit to the US, Scott proposes! Oh, and I'm still working with the same company, doing well.

As time goes on I get more involved in church life. I became a youth leader at some point before now, and worked with Scott on renovating a building to house a new church nearby.

27 - This was a busy year! We got married in May, bought a house in December and got pregnant in March! Somehow in there I had time to work, serve and have fun.

28 - Dominated by a growing belly and proportionately swollen ankles (I'm not even kidding, ask anyone!) the first half of my 28th year was tense as we learned that our daughter faced some medical problems. The second half was frankly tougher as we learned exactly what Emma, and we would face. Yet despite the trials we faced, we experienced the greatest joy of becoming parents, and a faith that was reassuringly strong, and well placed.

29 - After leaving my job before my 29th birthday, this was the first year in 13 years that I have not had any kind of job. However, I have never been so occupied in my life!! Becoming a stay-home mother has changed so much and I am still learning about my strengths and weaknesses. Thankfully God never gives up on helping us grow, and I look forward to seeing just how else my life can be enriched.

Each day offers a new challenge, joy or discovery. On the best days all three!!

Thank you for being a part of my journey. There is not much I would have ever imagined about my life now, especially the good stuff! Writing this blog has been a source of great joy and comfort. I look forward to sharing the future ups and downs!!

Friday, April 24, 2009

Sleep saga - Episode 5

Today began at 3.45am when I heard a knock on my bedroom door. Not quite sure if I heard anything Scott confirmed it! I opened up to find the nurse in her coat ready to leave! Something about her neighbors garage burning down.

I didn't question it to much, I just wanted to get the baby monitor and get back to bed! Unfortunately I was not able to go back to sleep really. I had to get up to disconnect the feed pump at 4.30am and at 4.45am I heard the air flow change from the CPAP. A check confirmed the prongs had come out of her nose - I wouldn't have heard it if I'd been really asleep.

When Emma started crying at 5.25am I asked Scott to go and get her back to sleep - he has to get up anyway! He did, so I tried to rest some more. After he went downstairs she started again and I popped in to give her pacifier back, but she saw me!

And so we got up at 5.45am. Awesome!

Around 8.30am I did something I've never done before - I put Emma in her crib so I could take a shower! I've always put her in her exersaucer before as I couldn't stand to hear the crying, but I'm used to it now!! And she even fell asleep for 10 minutes!

After that we went out on some errands. We popped in to the mall for the first time (lots of firsts today!!) and I picked Emma up some big girl sunglasses - she always takes our and tries to put them on!! Here they are...



After lunch I put her down for her nap and she was out cold in less than 5 minutes. It was the same last night! However, as always, she woke up after 30 minutes! She cried and fell asleep again for less than 30 minutes before crying incessantly for an hour.

We really have no problem with her falling asleep, she just won't sleep as long as 'they' say she should! I'm starting to wonder if she just doesn't need more sleep. Here's Emma watching Baby Signing Time after her 'nap' - strapped in to her chair. Does this look like a girl who didn't get enough sleep? She was so excited the whole time!



The sleep techniques are all about getting children to fall asleep, but none of them say what to do if they wake up too early!!

I'll stick to our schedule and leave her in there for a couple of hours, but if after another week she still only sleeps for an hour, I'll get her up after that.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

A little nothing!

As much as I love to do things with Emma, sometimes I just watch her and enjoy wondering what she is thinking. This video is what I was watching her do for about 10 minutes! I wanted to capture it as one of those quiet moments you forget.

(If you don't sit through the whole thing,
make sure you catch the last 45 seconds!!)




What is she playing with? A drumstick and milk container! And yes, that's all drool on her shirt!! Love my girl!

Sleep saga - Episode 4

This morning Emma was up by 5.30am, so of course she got very grouchy after breakfast. Since Grandma was coming over at 9am I caved in and let her take a little power nap on me for a few minutes. Yes, I am weak and easily manipulated.

Trying to redeem myself I put Emma down for her nap at noon. She fell asleep pretty quick, but I don't think she slept for more than 15 minutes at one time all afternoon. I thought that after doing this for a couple of days she'd cry a few times and eventually fall in to a deep sleep for at least an hour.

Maybe I'm doing something wrong (my loud inner-critic is sure of that!), but she seems to be sleeping less and less each day! I'm not giving up - it's been great to have a couple of hours each day to myself, even with the nightmare soundtrack!

I just don't understand when I am supposed to let her get up! I always planned that when she woke up refreshed and not crying i would know she'd had enough sleep, like in the morning. That hasn't happened, so I've been going by her feed times, which are still every 4 hours. Though today, in between crying out she was babling a bit, so I let her get up at 3pm!

I'm thinking Scott was right about his stubborn child!!

Pregnancy blues

My second pregnancy is going really well. I'm 18.5 weeks along (4 months!) and we are well into the second trimester. My health is good, no real aches or pains and I'm a little tired, but nothing excessive.

Last week I really started to feel the baby move. It's not constant yet, still too small, but the occasional flutter reminds me why my belly is getting bigger!

And that brings me to my blues!! Since I stopped breastfeeding I've gained about 10lbs! That's over 15lbs total, about 50% more than I should have. I'm still smaller than I was at this stage with Emma, but none of my regular pants are fitting anymore. I think I'd convinced myself that I could avoid maternity pants if I just kept the weight gain to a minimum. But as big as my belly has become, it's not the only area to have grown!

Today I went through all my clothes, current and old maternity. I put the regular stuff in storage and put the maternity tops in the drawers. The trouble is that the maternity pants I kept are a little big, and like I said my regular pants are not fitting.

This weekend will be in the 80's but there are still a couple of months of chilly spring to go. I hate to spend money on short-term maternity pants, but I fear my sweatpants may fall apart if they don't get to rest! (Not to mention poor Scott having to see the 'casual' me all the time!!) I have ordered some things online since there is not much selection in local stores. We'll see if I get anything decent!

Unfortunately there is no way to diet and I really suck at eating healthy by myself!! I guess there is no point in worrying too much. I can't diet now, I'll just keep trying to do better. (If you have some constructive 'advice' - please don't worry! It's nothing I haven't told myself, and already ignored!!)

Oh, and I got heartburn today. Great!

It will all be worth it in the end!!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Sleep saga - Episode 3

Have you seen Disney's The Incredibles? There's a scene at the end where the baby Incredible is getting kidnapped and at first he turns into a ball of flames, then a little devil, attacking the kidnapper, and finally a ball of steel so he drops him. It's pretty funny, but when I saw it recently it was hilarious.

Emma does exactly that! When I take her into her room at nap or bed time her first reaction is to start screaming, which turns her into a red ball of heat! Then when you pick her up to put her in bed she clings and climbs all over me, like the little devil!! She doesn't turn into a ball of lead, but as she scrambles to stay on my shoulder she gets hard to hold on to!!

____________________

Emma slept as well as on previous nights and was quick to fall asleep yesterday evening. It's such a blessing that I can relax from 7pm onwards! When Scott's finished all his overtime we'll have lots of time together.

Today turned out to be a free day. I'd been expecting Ema's speech therapist but got my days mixed up! I therefore was able to feed Emma lunch early, at 11am, when she started getting sleepy.

I put her down for her nap soon after the feed, before noon and opted to take a nap myself. For some reason I tried to put the CPAP on her and she seemed comfortable with that. Scott called soon after and the phone woke her up!

At 12.30pm I had to change her poopy diaper and of course the CPAP was off! I left it alone, not my priority right now!

She must have woken up every half hour or so, and I only went in on the occasions she was crying so much she was gagging herself! (She could actually choke on her own secretions so I had to check!)

After 3pm she sounded like she was sleeping well. At 3.30pm Scott called again!! This time she woke up again and I decided to let her up, after all it was time to eat again. She clung to me so tight and I think was ready to sleep on me!! Once she let go she seemed to be pretty happy, so maybe she's getting enough sleep, albeit broken. I feel quite refreshed!

Same thing tomorrow I guess!

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Sleep saga - Episode 2

I thought today would be easier. I was wrong!

We followed through last night and put Emma to bed awake. I gave her a bath first to try and calm her down, but Scott came home right before bed, so she got all worked up again! That said, we put her down and left her. She fell asleep in a bout a half hour.

This morning her nurse did as I asked and did not attend to her when she first roused crying. She soon fell asleep again for another 30 minutes. When she did wake up at 5.45am she didn't cry at all, just started babbling. That is a sign she is well rested. Another sign is that she did not fall asleep after breakfast.

I took Emma out grocery shopping with me in the morning and she was great until the last 5 minute drive home when she fell fast asleep. It was only 11.30am and i had to feed her before she could nap so I did my best to wake her up. Turns out all I had to do was put her in her bed because she popped right up then! I let her play for a while after her lunch and put her down for a nap at 12.45pm.

She clearly gets the picture and was much less cooperative today. She cried on and off for an hour or so. After reading more about the technique, which calls for you to go in after 20 minutes I did that and she flipped out. She had pooped though, so I changed her diaper.

I decided to stay out completely from then on. However at about 2.45pm her pulse ox alarmed that it was getting no input. No input often happen when she is kicking her feet about or standing, but she was quiet! I bolted up the stairs and moved her. Of course she was fine and now awake!!

I changed the probe on her foot and tried to put her back down. She clung to me like a Koala!

Her occupational therapist is coming at 4pm and I hoped to feed her about 3.30pm, but she hasn't actually slept properly yet! I'm not sure how we will get this to work if we only have a 3 hour window to do it!

Monday, April 20, 2009

Sleep saga - Episode 1

As you may recall (if you've been keeping up with the program!) I vowed to start the 'cry it out' sleep method this Monday. I actually started a bit early by putting her down on Friday afternoon. On Friday she stopped crying within a half hour and woke a couple of times but I left her alone and she fell asleep again.

Emma is not on her CPAP for naps, I decided to take it one step at a time. So she just has the one wire on her foot and that is hooked up to her pulse-ox, so I would know if her SATS or heart rate drops. That little alarm makes it all easier!! (I think I'll use it on the new baby when Emma's not sleeping!!)

Saturday we skipped nap altogether!

Sunday she went down for an afternoon nap and fell asleep again. It took a little longer than Friday, but again I left her alone for at least 2 hours.

Then on Sunday night I realized we were still 'putting her to sleep' in the evening, either by rocking her or reading to her! That was clearly going to void any work done at naptime, so last night she cried herself to sleep as well. I think it was less than a half hour. Unfortunately she went to bed a little late, but we'll try and keep to 7pm during the week at least!

On Monday she was up early as usual and while I told the nurse (the most strict one) to keep away from her when she woke up, Emma convinced her to read to her! What's a mum to do?! Anyway, she was dog tired by 9am so I thought we'd have a morning nap too. She got about 30-40 minutes sleep after the crying. I also got a few minutes before I woke to her crying.

I got her up as I really wanted to make sure the afternoon nap was not too late. I put her down just after 1pm and she was silent by 1.30pm! However she woke periodically until about 3pm, which of course was when the lady arrived to fit her new CPAP mask!! At least I know now that those first couple of hours are just the beginning of the nap! Try again tomorrow.

___________________________

You may wonder what I will be doing with all this free time I should have (when not napping myself!). The answer is simple, playing games! My amazing husband got me a Nintendo DSi for my birthday and I got enough giftcards to buy a range of games! Which ones? I love quizzes and puzzles, so I will be honing my brain activity to a new level of sharpness! ;-)

Highs and lows of party life

On Saturday Emma went from Ikea to a party with only a brief car-ride nap in between, Yet you would not have known it as she was the life and soul of the party! she clearly loves to dance as much as her mum!



Of course everyone has to crash sometime and how she slept on Mrs. T. through a very loud "Shout" I will never know!!


Birthday Surprise!

Next Sunday is my 30th birthday - I know, I don't look a day over 29!! Alas it's true, and although I'm not really feeling the need to start lying about my age, it is quite a milestone. Throughout your twenties you can kid yourself you're not really an adult yet (or you have trouble convincing other people you are an adult!) That's not possible after 30!

The culture in the UK is different than the US. We don't have graduations during our childhood, just at the end of university. And our main birthday milestones are 1, 18, and then it skips to 40! I have to say I'm starting to enjoy the American culture of celebrating as much as possible, and life in general. With so many challenges facing us all, celebrating our accomplishments is quite an encouragement.

That said, I wasn't sure what Scott would have in mind (and it wouldn't be right to plan something for myself!!), so I forgot about it. When a friend asked me to go to IKEA with her on Saturday I agreed as Scott was working and I am always up for IKEA! She did a great job of convincing me there was nothing extraordinary about the invite.

When she asked me to take her to an appointment afterward at the ballroom where her daughter is getting married I thought it was odd, but let it go. I knew nothing would be planned at such a posh (fancy!) venue, but when she suggested we also stop in the adjoining bar for something to eat I got a little suspicious! Though, I also called Scott and invited him to join us, so I wasn't that suspicious!!

We got to the venue and I didn't see any familiar cars so doubted my own suspicions, until we were shown to a room with all the doors closed! Behind them were 40 of my closest friends!!

As many people told me (and I already knew!) Scott is a wonderful husband and really went all out to celebrate my birthday. Check out the room - it was just like our wedding reception room!!


For food we had a buffet of salad, roast beef, spincach tortelliniand Chicken marsala with mashed potatoes and broccoli.

From 1.30pm to 5pm we had a great time. A friend of ours was DJing and played our wedding song for the first dance.
Unfortunately he had to leave early for another gig, and left Scott in charge...
It took quite a lot of persuasion to get him out on to the dancefloor he was having so much fun!

And of course, there was a great big cake...


Sunday, April 19, 2009

Never too young!

Our church has some awesome musicians who start our service every Sunday. As you can see, Emma appreciates them too...

Three Benefits of Good News

"For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord"
(Romans 6:23 NLT).

The good news is you're able to enter into a relationship with God through an attitude of trust in Jesus Christ; not through religion, rules, regulations, or rituals.

When we trust our lives to Jesus Christ we're given three incredible, fabulous, wonderful benefits. So, when we tell others about the good news, we can let them know: God forgives your past; he gives you purpose in the present; and, he offers you a future.

God forgives your past. None of us are perfect. Everybody has made mistakes. Everyone has skeletons in the closet—things he or she wishes had never happened. God comes along and says, "When you trust Jesus Christ with your life, I take everything you've ever done and wipe the slate clean. You get to start over with a brand-new life."

Now, is that good news?

God gives you purpose in the present. You are not an accident. God created you for a purpose. But you're never going to know God's purpose for your life until you first get to know God. When you get to know God, you're going to know who you are. When you figure out God, you're going to figure out yourself.

I meet people all the time who say, "I'm just trying to find myself." You know what—you probably aren't going to like yourself once you find yourself!

These people say, "There's something missing in my life." God's missing! You weren't made to live and go through life just on your own power.

God offers you a future. God gives you a future, a home in heaven. Most people hope they're going to heaven, but they're not sure. Most people think if you do more good in your life than bad, then maybe God will grade on a curve and say, "Okay, you can come in."

Wrong! It doesn't work that way. You won't get into heaven on your own power because you're just not good enough.

There's only one way we can get into heaven—on somebody else's ticket. Since none of us are perfect, God came to earth in human form as Jesus. Jesus lived a life of perfection. He died on the cross, paid for our sin, and then went back to heaven. Now you get into heaven on his ticket, if you trust him.

Romans 6:23 (NCV) says, "God gives us a free gift—life forever in Christ Jesus our Lord." It's a gift. That means you can't earn it, you can't work for it, and you can't own it in any way.

God says, "If you trust My Son with your life, you get forgiveness for your past, a purpose for living in your present, and a home in heaven in the future."

Is that good news?

Do you think anybody you know would be interested in that?

The world is hungry for good news.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Friday Fun

As you may recall it was about this time last year that Emma really started to laugh full belly-laughs. (http://ehmnews.blogspot.com/2008/04/no-doubt.html to relive it!) It was a huge milestone for us in understanding her feelings and we now take every opportunity to crack her up.

Here is an example of Emma finding not much very funny recently...



Here are some other ad hoc pictures that show a bit more of her personality!!

One is never enough!

Easy rider

Chillin in front the TV! (where are this girls parents?!!)


Thursday, April 16, 2009

Medical Rounds

Today was a marathon of medical meetings! We had two at the hospital and one in the afternoon at the pediatricians (just jabs). Needless to say the day started early, 6am for me when I grabbed a shower before the nurse left, but 5.20am for Emma who wanted to play with Dorothy before she left!

We finally left the house at 8.15am to make our first appointment at 9am. I planned to leave earlier, but I had to feed Emma early and I guess she had not fully digested the night feed so she had a lot of discomfort and fell asleep!

The drive into the city was manic, as rush hour tends to be. I gave as good as I got!!

We made it for 9am, and after the obligatory wait we went to our room. Emma weighed in at an awesome 20lbs 6oz! She is now in the 10th percentile - so only 90% of kids her age are bigger than her!! (She was in the 5th!)

Dr. B, the GI doc and Robin, the nutritionist, were really pleased with Emma's growth and development. The only problem we've had since the switch to all formula is constipation. It's been pretty bad and Emma screams when she poops. The solution? We are going to give her more water. If that doesn't help, prune juice, and finally a laxative.

Robin asked Dr. B. the chances of baby #2 having gastroschisis. He confirmed that we had no more chance than anyone else, which is great. She also told me he had said if the baby does have any surgical needs he wants to be the surgeon!! Clearly Emma is a favorite patient.

Next stop was Dr. R., Pulmonologist. He was really pleased with Emma and reminded me that he said from the beginning that she is very normal, as he observed her chewing on the CPAP mask I brought with us!

I had previously emailed him about her sleep issues. Was it better for her to sleep with me and no CPAP, or sleep only briefly on the CPAP, at naptimes? I also sent him the picture of her sleeping standing up. It was this that told him her sleep problems are behavioral. Usually around 2yrs children rebel against naps - Emma is early! He suggested the Ferber method of letting her cry it out. I explained my concerns about her calorie burning, and all the wires etc she could catch around her.

He said that if she is safe, just let her cry it out, yes - even for 3 hours if that's what it takes! Apparently for bedtime routines it takes about 3 days to teach them who's the boss. Scott thinks it will be longer for his child!

So my plan is to start the torture on Monday, allowing me a few days to get lots of sleep in!! One word of caution Dr. R. gave was that if at any point I start to understand why child abuse occurs then I need to change the situation! I can see why he said that, it can get quite frustrating, however I feel it will be easier if I know she will be fine and I do not try and sleep! That's right, I need to keep myself busy and distracted or I'll get upset.

We also got approval for the swallow study. Dr. R. said that we will only know over time which cranial nerves are affecting Emma's swallow process. We may not be able to work on it until she gets older and can communicate in more detail. In the meantime we will continue to encourage her tasting enthusiasm - she even tried a pickle the other day!!

Something that is encouraging is the development in her eyes. Emma is unable to blink reflexively like you or I. As an infant she never moved her eyelids unless she was sleeping and then we felt they dropped by themselves. As time has gone on, Emma is able to deliberately close her eyes, presumably at will. She doesn't yet respond to instructions to close her eys (and sleep), but she does close them in bright light! We can only hope for the same progress in her swallowing.

The pediatricians appointment was routine, her last Synagis shot of the season. She took it with the customary red face and screaming! What did really bother me is that the elevator wasn't working. Normally 8 steps isn't a problem, but being pregnant and heaving a 20lb toddler and heavy stroller up them was mighty annoying, although not impossible. You'd think a building that houses 3 doctors offices and a physical therapy rehab would make more of an effort to have it fixed right away, and I told them so!

You may also have noticed Emma is up to 79 ASL (American Sign Language) signs. This is remarkable, especially when she uses them spontaneously and together. Some are clearer than others as you might expect from a baby. We are trying to rotate the DVDs so she doesn't forget the ones she doesn't use very often! Emma has also begun to use ESL (Emma's sign language!)! The first sign is a finger pointing at her tongue. 'Eat/food' in ASL is the fingertips brought up to the mouth. The finger pointing is the sign for 'pacifier'!!

We're also working on teaching Emma the four main colors. The signs aren't on any DVDs, but we looked them up. Unfortunately the way I say 'blue' (ba-lue) sounds a lot like balloon. So I'm working on my own pronunciation!

Tomorrow I'm looking forward to taking Emma outside in the warm weather and making some bubbles!! I'll try and video it.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

What now?

In our Devotionals series, Pastor Rick Warren discusses the Bible passages that inspire him the most. Today's Devotional is based on this passage:

"'What shall I do, then, with the one you call the king of the Jews?' Pilate asked them"
(Mark 15:12 NIV).

Two thousand years ago, in the Middle East, an event occurred that permanently changed the world. Because of that event, history was split. Every time you write a date, you're using the resurrection of Jesus Christ as the focal point.

What does this mean to us today? In one sense, Jesus Christ is still on trial. He's on trial in the heart and mind of every person who has not yet acknowledged Him as the Son of God, the Savior of the world.

Was Jesus a liar, a lunatic, or Lord?

Jesus claimed to be the Savior of the world. In John 12:47, He is recorded as saying: "I didn't come to judge the world. I came to save it." Some people say, "I believe Jesus was a good teacher." But, He couldn't be just a good teacher because a good teacher would not say, "I'm God, and I'm the only way to heaven." A good person would not say that unless it was the truth.

What's your verdict?

- Is Jesus who He says He is? Is He God? Or is He a lunatic or a liar?

- If He is who He says He is, when will you start following what He says to do with your life?

Today, you sit in judgment of Jesus Christ. Just as Pilate asked, "What shall I do then with Jesus who is called the Christ?" you also must decide whether He was who He said He was or not.

Funny guy

Last week my parents sent me some chocolate from England. Now, I have a sweet tooth (or 10) so I like most chocolate, but the Brits beat the Americans hands down in chocolate! Don't believe me? You'll have to try it one day, but I can't promise I'll share!!!

Last night I had a few of the small bars out for a bit of a chocolate binge. When Scott saw them he asked why they were out. I told him, "I'm going to eat them!" He didn't think I should, so while I went to feed Emma he hid them around the living room!

It took me over an hour to negotiate the location of three of the bars (which I ate!), but I never found the fourth and I didn't mind, I had indulged the craving and figured I'd find it today.

So, we went to bed. We usually leave one light on in the living room in case the nurse needs to come downstairs, so I put that on and turned everything else off.

Upstairs I brushed my teeth and put the new nightlight I'd bought, in the bathroom. We usually leave the bathroom light on all night for the nurses but our bulbs keep dying! A few minutes later I had to use the bathroom again (for a drink!) and I detected a strange smell. It was not bad but it did have a burning tinge!

I took out the nightlight and brought it in our room, explaining to Scott that I thought it was burning, but it smell like candy. He couldn't smell anything, but did ask if I'd switched everything off downstairs. I said I had, but had turned the one light on. Scott asked if I'd found the last chocolate bar, and when I said I hadn't he said I'd better go and switch the lamp off!

You guessed it, the burning candy smell was my LAST chocolate bar cooking on top of the light bulb! Before falling off the bulb, the wrapper melted into the chocolate, dripping chocolate all over the light bulb.

It was all very funny, and Emma's nurse had a good laugh too! The moral of this story - don't hide things where they pose a fire risk if not discovered!!

Our kids are going to have lots of fun with their dad when they get older!!